Like anyone who puts his or her work out for the world to see, I have doubts about what people will think about it. I have fears that nobody will like it or that I will receive harsh criticism.
I have other fears, too, just like everyone does.
Most of these fears are fleeting. They don’t last long and they aren’t debilitating. Some are pretty silly when I think about them in the light of day. (Not so silly when they come in a dream, however.)
How do I manage fear?
What I don’t do is follow the advice that says, “Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway,” detailed in a book by that name. Don’t get me wrong, I do it anyway, usually, I just don’t feel the fear.
Why feel the fear and infuse it with energy? Why give it more weight than it probably deserves?
So no, I don’t feel the fear. I look at it rationally and ask myself if there is anything I can learn from it or anything I must do about it. Usually, the answer is no.
I acknowledge the fear, and then I change the subject.
I think about something else that feels better when I think it. I think about a positive aspect of the subject at hand or I think about something completely unrelated.
Yes, you can distract yourself from negative thoughts and fears. That’s why God invented sports and movies, isn’t it?
So yeah, once I know that my fear doesn’t offer me anything I need, it’s not protecting me from harm, Â I change the subject.
Usually that’s all I need to do. Sometimes, the fear is stubborn and I need to do more. If I’ve already decided to move forward, I put that fear in a mental lock box.
Actually, instead of a box, sometimes I put the fear in a mental balloon filled with helium and let the balloon float away. Images are powerful and I’ve found that when something is really bothering me, strong imagery helps me to regain control.
Sometimes fears return. I’ll do a quick double check, to see if they have anything worthwhile to tell me, and if not, back in the box or balloon they go.
I guess what I’m saying is that you have to get good at compartmentalizing things. If you’ve done your homework and you’re committed to doing something, put on blinders and do it. Don’t let your doubts or fears stop you.
Every so often, it’s good to take a look around you, just to make sure. But whatever you do. . . don’t open that box.
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